I'M ALIVE........

Just letting you all know Im alive and well. Been flat our catching babies and working my butt off.

Got heaps funny stuff to tell you but don't have the time.

Will fill you in soon........

Why I live where I live?????

People ask me all the time why I work in Sydney and live on the Mid North Coast and there is only one simple answer. This photo is taken from my bedroom window, I look straight out to sea. In whale season I can watch whales go by from my bed!!!!

Now is that a good enough reason????

Why adults should shower alone

Coming home from a hard weeks work, Stephen proceeded to tell me about the weeks events. At the top of his list was an incident between him and Joshua when they were having a shower (if you ever have kids you will know how impossible it is to have a shower without a little person wanting to come in). Washing his hair, full of shampoo, Josh was playing around with some toys and the plastic part of a razor with no razor head on it (obviously), not looking down, Stephen felt this sharp pain in his left testicle, Joshua had the razor in his hand and had proceeded to not only jab Stephen in the nether regions but also twist it at the same time. As described by Stephen, he felt the pain sear right up to his teeth and back again. I thought it was funny and reminded him of the time I was in labour and he asked me not to overdose on the gas!!!! haha Karma is a great thing...

A week that was...

Full on week this week. I've come to some conclusions that I MUST abide by in order to stay alive and not risk killing myself in some freak accident.
The first one is:

I shall never touch the car again other than put petrol in it and put the key in and turn it on.

This is because I decided to fill my car with oil and couldn't get the cap open so I took the dipstick out and careful filled up the dipstick holder with oil as I thought the two were joined and the oil would go into the bigger part where the oil is meant to go. I then got the lid off the oil part thingy and poured the rest of the 4 litres in. So, as you might have guessed I had oil coming out of the dip stick holder and the main oil container thingy. So because all men are stupid and I couldn't find a decent one to help me, I got a nasal gastric tube and a 2o ml syringe and proceeded to surgically remove the oil from the two parts. I didn't scrub up but did get some funny looks as I was in the staff quarters where Doctors live, maybe for some fun I should have put on a surgical mask just for my own amusement.

Secondly, I thought filling the car up with water would be a simple task. I did it as per the manual and was putting the cap on when opppssss I dropped the cap down into the engine bay and couldn't reach it. I looked everywhere for a torch but all I could find was some Christmas lights, so I plugged the flashing coloured chrissy lights in and carefully fed them through the motor to see where the cap was. At this point Joshua decided to drape himself in Christmas lights and looked quiet pretty. Just then Steve pulled up with a friend, here I was with Josh looking like he was ready for the mardi gras and me decorating the car engine with Christmas lights so I could see. So I did the only thing any normal person would do, I got the lid off the milk container and put that on instead. A week later its still holding.

Then, last but not least, after a long nightshift I decided to go up the shops and get the paper before going to bed, I didn't notice the keep left sign as I turned right and you guessed it, took the keep left sign out- head on. My poor car will never be the same.

So besides from that, things have been pretty good. Check out my other blog 'the life and times of unit 147 for details on whats been happening in the compound.

The fairy with the glowing hair

This is me, the magical fairy with glowing hair that can blow magical fireworks in the air

Finally the photos....

The two queens and some fireworks

Now thats a SHIP!!!!!

Decided to take myself and my flatmate for a leisurely drive on Tuesday and dunk my feet in the ocean. So we headed down to the harbour and to our surprise saw these too massive big boats, named after some Queens. I took photos but You'll have to wait to see them as I haven't downloaded them yet.

I cannot describe the size of these monsters, looking at the Queen Mary and the Queen Elizabeth was out of this world.

The night was made even more special being locked in the botanical gardens by some mean spirited rangers. It wasn't like we were the only ones in the park, he locked the gates on 1000's of people.

The leisurely walk from central railway station to Circular key was also full of colour. If I ever have a mental illness (if I don't already have one), then I hope I get one that makes me see funny stuff. This guy was pissing himself laughing right next to us for a good few 100 metres, and me being the person I am couldn't help myself and started laughing too....My flat mate, who is a shy English girl was laughing at me laughing at him. This guy had great material cause whatever was making him laugh was hysterical. Maybe he had just left one of those laughing workshops and he couldn't stop, or maybe he had a disease that made him laugh all the time, like a tick. Wouldn't it be horrible if you had Turettes Syndrome, or narcolepsy or you had that disease that made you orgasm all the time...mmmm.....imgine if you had all three???

How did I get to that point? I was talking about boats before.

So yes the boats were good, about 1000000 people all through Sydney and the police service decide to have an RDO.

Fireworks were amazing, like NYE in Sydney. Can't wait to add the photos.

Snow patrol was very cool. Only the Irish and English people knew all their songs but I did get a live video of chasing cars- just imagine 1000's of people singing the one song. It was awesome.

Looked after a baby that weighed 980gms and saw one that weighed 680gms. I'm getting used to all the really small sized baby's, a normal baby actually looks massive compared to there little suckers.

And it continues.......

Like flies to a big pile of dog doo doo, so does the excitement and dramas that surround my everyday life.
I'm back off to Sydney in about half an hour. I don't mind the drive so much, its great to listen to my favourite tunes and let my mind wonder.
I guess in years to come hopefully I will look back at my blog and have a little laugh at how I beat the hard times and came through shining at the other end.
I've got another hurtle to overcome now too. For months I haven't been all that well. I was concerned and so were my doctors that I have the same cancer as my dad. I was suppose to have some tests done in August last year but held off until after my school reunion, I didn't want to go knowing I may have the same death sentence as my dad.

I had the tests and they came back negative. I didn't have that nasty arse disease that randomly picks the nicest people.

So I continued on with life until my problems kept on continuing. I'd have 'attacks' similar to an anaphalatic reaction and an asthma attack combined. Now they have decided that I could possibly have 'Carcinoid Syndrome', which is basically a tumour in the gut or intestines or bowel that releases too much histamine or other chemicals. I've now officially finished this test and will wait the results in the next few days, the longer I don't hear anything the better the news is. If this is positive, it means I have to see an oncologist to decide whether or not they can find it and remove it. Its pretty slow growing so hopefully it isn't too big but secretly I am hoping its about 4kg and somewhere in my stomach so when I come out of surgery I'll have a nice flat washboard stomach. hehe so immature aren't I?

Basically for me, it means that I continue on with life, continue to not grow up and remain immature, and continue doing exactly what I am now until the last possible second. My dad went back to work after having his Kidney out 6 days after, he continued to work during chemo treatment occasionally pulling over on the side of the road to spew, I guess I am alot like my dad. I don't intend on changing a thing.

So there you go, another bloody thing to deal with, like working and studying and kids weren't enough.

But don't right me off just yet, I have lots more living to do.

P.S can you please remind me that blondes don't need to dye their hair blonder. I made the mistake of going 6 shades lighter and I now look like an albino- my hair is WHITE!!! and no I won't be posting any pics anytime soon. I'm officially in hiding...

To my dear friend Matthew and his partner Kylie

May your wedding in April be a special day for both of you.

Life can be hard sometimes but I know that the two of you will work together and have a happy life together.

Marriages and relationships are not easy, and it does take alot of work, heck I should know, but by working together as a team you can work though anything.

Just remember, as long as you are best friends, you trust each other completely and you have a physical connection (wink wink), any marriage or relationship can work.



I look forward to seeing you Kylie, walk down the aisle as weddings are such a special day and I'm so glad you have allowed me to share it with you.



All the best for the future,



Love you long time,

Goonie Goo Goo

WOW can you see the difference......

The photo on the top is me the night before I went Sydney on the 19th of January, the one on the bottom is me yesterday.... 4 weeks difference....

And the big news is.....

I've lost............

11.9kg.........in that time..........

YAY.....

A second Quote of the week

"All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me...You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you."
- Walt Disney

Quote of the week

Your life is your own. This is your very own personal journey through the world. While it never hurts to listen to advice and consider someone else's point of view, you are ultimately responsible for making your own choices. You deserve the chance to learn and grow from your own mistakes - and you deserve for your victories to be your very own!

Taking time out

I turned off the mobile, left it at home and took my family to the beach this afternoon for some major time out. As I walked onto the main part of the beach I saw this......Para sailing surf boarders, horses, How good was this, and all 50 metres from my front door.

I sat down and just forgot the world for an hour, I dug my feet in the sand, and smelt the sea breeze

A lovely self portrait.

Big Brother Helps out!!

This is my stressed look, you can tell by the frown....But I soon destressed and enjoyed a lovely hour relaxing with my boys.

Happy Belated Valentines Day everyone!!!!!!

Snow Patrol- Monday 19th of Feb

I actually got tickets to a show that was sold out in minutes!!!!!! So looking forward to seeing snow patrol in a few days even if it did cost me more than double the ticket price. Sometimes you can't put a price on experience.

A Week In the life of a Student Midwife

Again, I'm home and very excited to have a whole 5 days off. The house is clean, the kids are not sick and I'm on top of all my uni work. So what better way to spend a few hours than to walk across the road and go to the beach. After staying in Sydney with so much cement and dead grass, its nice to walk bear feet on the sand and smell the sea breeze. I'm going to build sandcastles with Joshua and take some photos. I'll be in my element.

The nannygate affair has finally resolved itself. I have a great nanny moving in on Saturday. Jessica seems to be a lovely girl and I hope it works out so I can continue commuting stress free to Sydney.

As far as work is concerned, I'm loving it. Not always good, but I get a chance to have lots of cuddles with very little babies working in the Intensive Care Unit. At first I was a little apprehensive handling the tiniest of tiny babies but now I'm getting used to picking them up and doing what needs to be done. Its great to work with the families and the mums and dads and help them go through a time that is sometimes not as smooth as we would like. Explaining whats happening and empowering them to handle their babies being so small or sick. In 2 weeks Im in the delivery suite. So, again thrown into the deep end, catching baby's (we don't deliver baby's we deliver pizzas, the mums deliver, I just catch).

Valentines Day was yesterday. I had a surprising lovely day and night. Theres nothing like being a little spoilt.

To my anonymous worldly commenter, I moderate all my comments because of you as this is MY CS BLOG, and a way for my FRIENDS, to see what I have been up to, and for me to reflect on events in the past, present and future. One day I'll look back with great memories of that time in my life. My posts are my thoughts and feelings and don't represent another person, corporation or organisation. So basically to you, read another blog, and stay off my blog territory. I don't want to waste my time on a NAB and won't be from now on.

Thats life!!!

Again I start off by letting you all know how great my professional life is going. I love coming to work- I guess that means since I commenced my Midwifery I haven't worked a day yet. The responsibilities are huge, but with that goes reward. To look after a baby who weighs less than a can of coke or to support a vulnerable mother going through labour are things that empower me and make me grow professionally but also impact on me personally too. Its not always good news, or a happy event, some times its tinged with sadness as well.

Commuting to Sydney is interesting. Because I love coming down and then going home the drive so far hasn't been bad. I get lots of time to talk to myself and sing to my fav 80's band. I even videoed myself driving on my phone to see what I looked like- daggy but amusing for myself.

I have decided January is the worst month of the year for me. My dad on the 19th and now his sister, My Aunty, who passed away on Saturday. In 12 months almost to the day, my Nan has lost two children way too early. The hardest thing ever was walking into the hospital and seeing her, but instead of her I saw my dad staring back at me. They have the same eyes, the same shaped head- the same look. She talked to me and when asked what she was thinking about replied 'Terry actually'. Thats my dad, OMG that was hard to listen too. I don't know whether my dad was waiting for her. I always picture my dad not as a sick person but as a big strong man in his police uniform, standing over all of us, kind of still protecting us.

So this week has been hard in more ways than one. Last week I posted a lovely post about someone I so dearly treasure. I was so happy. Then to deal with my Aunty's death and work and uni, I was under a lot of stress.

Yesterday I checked my emails and found the worst comment someone could ever write, left on my public blog. Someone who obviously was a total coward because they left the comment anonymous, voiced their personal opinions on my life and situation as if they knew what I was living and if they had walked in my shoes. Or maybe they just picture themselves as someone higher than thou, someone who lives a perfect existence, in their own little perfect world.

To that person, its OK, you obviously mean nothing to me. To voice your opinions the way you did was the lowest anyone could possibly go and for that reason, I won't share with anyone that part of my life anymore. I'll be selfish and keep my happiness to myself.

I once read this book, its called the bible, you should pick it up sometime. I remember a story about someone removing the log out of their own eye before they try and get the twig out of another....I also remember the bible saying something about an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth.....mmmm obviously this person forgets my amazing memory ability. Your comments have been stored in my memory bank for later use.

I hope all my real friends are well and will be in touch.

take care

The Big Job

A week has gone by and so many things have happened, as per usual in the life of a Williams.

I'm still enjoying my work, looking after babies at the moment in a special care ward. Soon I'll be in the birthing suite and delivering babies everyday. Very scary responsibility but I love it and will enjoy the challenge.

I enjoy it even more because I know I've done this on my own. I've achieved exactly what I wanted to professionally and I'm thrilled to be doing something I love so much.

"It is good to have an end to journey towards, but it is the journey that

matters, in the end."- Ursula Le Guin

The week that was!!!

I cannot believe I have been a week without Internet or mobile phone. I started my job in Sydney last week and left my recharger for my phone at home, also have no net access but did have my laptop so I started a journal and write stuff in it every week- you never know, one day it might be a best selling book or something...hehehehe

So last week started off with Joshua covering himself in hair removal cream, funny yes, but not at the time. He now has a nice little reseeding hairline with beautiful curls at the back. he put it all over his legs too....this mimicking thing is getting out of control.


Wednesday the 17th saw my big boy turn 11!!! Time flys doesn't it...wow I'm a mummy to an 11yr old. We had a lovely day with family and cooked homemade pizzas for dinner.

Friday was my mums birthday, also the first anniversary of my dads death. I didn't know what to do to take away the day being about my dad rather than my mum, it was a hard one, but me in all my powers and wisdom managed to get Lee Kernaghan tickets. Not only did I get tickets, I also got his P.A's mobile number who just so happened to be sitting next to Lee at the time. I told him my mums story, that it was her birthday and also the day her husband died, and not only did Lee sing a beautiful song and dedicate it to my dad, he also took his hat off at the end which was so beautiful. To top it off we got invited back stage and met him and his band. He was very nice, asked lots of questions and was a true gentleman. We got a happy snap and now instead of that day being focused on my dad, we focused it on giving my mum a small bit of happiness on her special day.

Saturday saw me meet up with a heap of people from a mummy and mummy to be group in Sydney. We met at home bush and had a great time. It was bloody hot but still an enjoyable day.

Sunday was my day of relaxation. I spent the whole day completely relaxed and happy for the first time in a long time. I spent the most amazing day with the most amazing person. For that I am so grateful.

Monday was the beginning of my new career as a Midwife. I've been in special care all week and it is really cool. I completely love it. I have been looking after the smallest babies ever. Its great and Im loving every minute of it.

So I am home now for 3 nights, then back to Sydney for 5 days. Busy but it will be worth it in the end.

I miss my kids like crazy- but doing this to be happy both professionally and personally.

Meeting Lee Kernaghan
My boys on Codys Birthday

My big boy

The Nanny Gate affair

Its not like anything goes smoothly in Williams World. I had it all planned. A nanny from New Zealand, I booked and paid for her airfare, and was all ready to commence work next week and Au Pair was arriving on the 4th of Feb, all my plans finally coming into place.
Yesterday I get an email to say she isn't coming....great...non refundable ticket...may as well give someone I hate a few hundred bucks and it would have been less painful....

Back to the drawing board I guess

Joshua said the funniest things today

My little man is only 16 months old but is coming out with the funniest things.

The other day he looked at my friend and handed an eggplant to her and said "Can I have that'.

Today, he says 'Is today Monday?' I said NOOOOO its Saturday. Wow he is starting to say full sentences.

He also asked me 'what is that for?' when I was doing something in the kitchen.

His little gabbles are coming out really clear and I laugh when he says things like that.

He is my clever little man.

Funny Names

Thought Id share some of the names I found on a website- parents can be so unkind lol, some of them cracked me up but the winner is someone who wrote on a well knows births forum I pop into a story about someone naming their girls Tahlia and Jenna and apparently the mum yelled out at a party Jenna Tahlia come here, she wondered why everyone went quiet so now she calls them out as Tahlia....pause......Jenna.......

HAHAHAHAHA

Adam Zapel
Al Bino
Al Fresco
Alf A. Romeo
Amanda Lay (real person)
Amanda Lynn (a mandolin)
Anita Bath
Anita Knapp
Aretha Holly
Barb Dwyer
Skip Dover
Bud Wieser (real college math teacher)
Buster Hyman
C. Good (alledgedly a real eye doctor)
Carrie Dababi ("carry the baby" - Dababi is an Egyptian name)
Constance Noring
Craven Moorehead
Dick Bender (real sports person)
Dick Finder (real name of a urologist)
Doris Schutt (Doris Open...)
Doug Graves
Doug Witherspoon
Dr. Beaver
Dr. Bender (Chiropracter)
Dr. Butcher
Dr. DeKay
Dr. Gass (allegedly a real anesthesiologist)
Dr. Hurt (real pediatrician in Saginaw, MI)
Dr. Hymen
Dr. Look (real opthalmologist in Hawaii)
Dr. Looney - a psychiatrist of course!
Dr. Payne (plastic surgeon in Sandusky, OH)
Dusty Sandmann (real person, submitted by his dad Roger Sandmann)
Evan Keel
Faith Christian
Fanny O'Rear
Ferris Wheeler
Dr. Frank Bonebreak (real doctor)
Gae Hooker (allegedly real surgical prep nurse)
Gladys C. Hughes (glad to see you)
Harry Balls
Harry P. Ness
Harry Rump (a real plumber from Freemont, Maine!)
Helen Waite (credit manager - if you want credit go to Helen Waite)
I.D. Clair
I.M. Boring
Ima Hogg (a real person, daughter of a Texas governor)
Jim Laucher (gym locker)
Lance Boyle
Lance Butts
Laura Norder (law and order)
Lisa May Dye
Lou Zar (loser)
Mike Sweeney (sounds as Mike's weenie)
Mo Lestor
Ray Zenz (raisins)
Richard Chopp (real Urologist in Austin, TX, does vasectomies)
Reginald Soles (allegedly real brothers: R. Soles)
Dr. Steven Sumey (Dr. sue me, real person in Fairmont, MN)
Ty Coon
Will Wynn (Mayor of Austin, Texas)
Willie Leak (or won't he)

We found a Nanny!!!!

Wow I can't believe I found an Au Pair- got a lovely girl from New Zealand coming to live with us in early Feb to help care for boys. Works out cheaper than day care. I'm less stressed about going back to work now. She also speaks french so my kids will be able to swear in English and French!!! Nah she said she would be willing to teach them french too so I am sooo happy.

Will keep you all informed..........

My dad

Not a day goes by when I don't think of you. I don't have any regrets, I said and did all I had to do for you. It doesn't get easier- only someone who has experienced a death might understand. At least you would have loved your funeral- set on our property, you were already cremeted, we had a great service, I did the eulogy with Uncle Jack, I didn't want to but did. We played your favourite songs and of course had red and white as the theme. We released all these red and white balloons and watched them go really high- after that we ate and drank and then played back yard cricket. I looked up and saw someone had put a bottle of beer near your ashes and moved them so you could see the cricket game- you would have laughed at that. You would have said 'well done meego' only you ever called me that so imgine my surprise when Joshua called me 'meego' a few weeks ago, you must have told him. Cody Joel and Oskar put a single rose each near your ashes, by the end of the day they had died. I took photos of the flowers cause I wanted something to remember the day- so we didn't just have one day to remember you, but a lifetime. I made a DVD, it took me forever and many sleepless nights and we played this at the end, it wasn't sad, it was entertaining and we all had a laugh. Thank you for being so strong until Josh was born. I hated the doctors telling me how bad you were and I'm sorry I didn't tell you the whole truth but I didn't want you to give up. The only thing I'm pissed off about was that you died on mums birthday!! How am I ever going to do anything nice for her on her birthday knowing that its the day you left us. I found you, it felt like Christmas day but without the presents and happiness- the smell of Christmas was still in the air, I tried so hard to imagine that you were just sleeping but I knew to keep you would have been selfish. I knew you didn't have to suffer anymore.

I'm angry cause now I can never get married with happiness- I dont have a dad to walk me down the asile, no dad to give me away or to do a toast. I don't know I could ever do such a big thing knowing an empty chair is all I have to remember you there. I still spray your aftershave in the house just to smell you, I have your ashes and wont let anyone take them.

Take care of Aunty Hazel, she left us just after you. And hold on to my little daughter until Im ready, I know you wanted her when you were alive but you'll just have to hold her for a while until she is ready for me. You know what I mean.

Love you dad.

We spent the last few days together hanging out on the beach and my place. I think my mate is pretty dam cool. Although we are like chalk and cheese (she is a cement girl, I'm a tree girl), we enjoyed our brunches together, visiting Forster and Taree and seeing Old Bar. With the beach mission on every day for a week, the kids have been so busy we haven't really seen then. Its been lots of fun. Caught up with our old principle from High school which was cool, he still calls me by my full name, its funny.

NYE was a pretty quiet one. I just couldnt wait for the year to be over. I know and hope that 2007 is going to be my year, with 20 days to go until I'm living in two places at once and offically a student midwife, I cant wait. I can't wait to catch up with my friends in Sydney and getting my shopping fix...and of course delivering all those beautiful babies....I am positive I haven't finished populating the world yet. One day, I'll have another baby, the whole family and kids thing is my world.

Back to Megan: I think I scared her with my driving, and the fact that I come out with really bizzare things hours after something had happened. It was funny watching her try to sneek up to a rabbit that was on the grass near the beach. I'm sure she loved my singing in the car on the way to see christmas lights...

We had a perfect view of a huge chunk of the mid North Coast so we could see all the local fireworks but we preferred to watch the Sydney ones on Telly, it was almost real life, the TV is a huge plasma sucker so we were pretty happy.

I'm glad the new year is here, so bring on all the good thigns that will take place in 2007.

New Year New Life

Today is the first day of the rest of my new life.....

Went out on saturday and didn't realize my right boob had been hanging out for most of the night, so glad I was wearing a nice lacey pink bra. I only realized when I hopped back in the car, What can you do but laugh.....

So this year my new years resolution is too keep my puppies firmly in place when out in public.

I also plan on downsizing the stuff that seems to fill my house and I am constantly picking up- so ovwer the next few weeks all will be cleaned out....

Hope all of you had a great night last night- I's like to say I had a ball and still haven't gone to bed but I'm sure there are 90 yr olds that stayed up longer than me....

Christmas 2006

Have a great Christmas Day

To all my friends and family (and the millions of other people out there checking out my blog),

Although right now Christmas feels like just another day, I wanted to take the opportunity to wish you all a wonderful, safe Christmas and a healthy new year.
This year wont be the same for me. For the past 30 years, or as long as I can remember, this time of year was filled with happiness and fun. My dad would always be the one to pick up his Christmas presents and shake and feel them, he would also count how many he had- and always ask how long until he gets all his goodies!!!

My dad isn't here anymore, If it wasn't for having three beautiful boys, I might not even celebrate this year. It's hard to picture a Christmas day without my dad sitting there with his top off, eating and drinking and playing with us kids and grandkids. It hurts too much to cry anymore, its gone beyond that. Time doesn't heal, it just makes you miss them more.......

Anyway- For all of you who wished me a happy 2006, you ALL SUCK. This year has been terrible. To let you know just how sucky my year has been, I've:

Lost my job for having a baby
Lost my house for going guarantor
Didn't get on the biggest loser
Didn't get on Big Brother
Didn't get on the Australian Princess
Didn't loose weight
Didn't become the next Australian Idol!!! (some foreigner got that!)
Didn't win the lotto

Pretty much just had a shitty year really....

Oh and I had a crap birthday

So in future please don't pass on your well wishes- As you can see, it goes to waste, instead all donations of cash can be made to Me (no cheques please), at my address. Anonymous donations welcome too.

Santa, if you are reading this, I take back all the bad things I have said and done and would really like to win the 33 million on the 30th of December, will gladly share with all the right people.

More on Me

I've been told I'm quiet entertaining and I should have my own reality TV show... I have attempted to become a reality queen numerous times now without success so I have to live my dream of being famous through this blog. The only problem is, the stories are real (although funny) and they all happen to ME.

I guess Yumour is my way around lifes stresses. If I sat here and told you about the bad stuff that has happened I'd bore you, but if I focus on the interesting and funny things, I make myself smile and you laugh too.

Tonight I rang a radio station up to win a prize for the best fart story so I told the one about my mum farting and the XPT train responding.... It was funny cause the next thing I know the announcers are telling me my mum should put out a CD for Christmas 'Meegans Mum Unplugged', it was funny and a HTBT (had to be there) joke....

Its not just me either, my kids are starting to act like me. JOshua ran down in the middle of Cody and Joels presentation at school and screamed so the whole school could see him, all the kids started laughing and I had to take him home as he was too much of a disruption.

I was also cleaning boxes out at home and found my year 4 school report. It clearly stated that I am a performer and a good singer with great ability. Then why did I recieve a first and final warning for singing kareoke at a Christmas party last year??? I should have taken my year 5 report to court as evidence!!!

Some people even suggest I take up stand up comedy??? Can you imagine that?? My next performance appraisal will give me a first and final warning for telling a bad joke.

Did you know I once tried to swim on the front lawn to encourage dad to get a swimming pool and almost severed my throat and tonsils with the snorkel I had in my mouth... That was bad, I had to eat baby food for a week.

Do you remember the movie Dumb and Dumber when they licked the ice??? I've licked the freezer and my tongue got stuck to it...

Did you know I met Nelson Mandella??? Yep I did, he was at the zoo when the 2000 Olympics was on. He was feeding animals and wanted a photo with my boys. I don't think they liked him cause he was a stranger.

Lastly, Is it bad to drink fish tank water???

Becs graduation

I had the honour tonight of going to see a beautiful girl graduate from year 10. It seemed like only yesterday that I graduated from school and today felt very very old!!!

My mate Kylie's 16 year old daughter graduated and looked stunning. I must say, I had a tear in my eye because she looked so beautiful and because I have all boys and won't get that same mother daughter memory!!!!

For the man I truely love with all my heart

Merry Christmas baby....May 2007 be OUR year........

We'll do it all

Everything On our own

We don't need

Anything Or anyone

If I lay here

If I just lay here

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know

How to say How I feel

Those three words

Are said too much

They're not enough

If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told

Before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time

Chasing cars

Around our heads

I need your grace

To remind me

To find my own

If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told

Before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am

All that I ever was

Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where

Confused about how as well

Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Snow Patrol- Chasing Cars

10 to 1 williams embarrasing moments

10. My mum once farted and we heard a train in the distance blow its horn in response.

9. My brother opened a can and it spirted all over a mans glasses

8. I licked the freezer and my tongue got stuck to it, my dad pulled my head off and I lost the tip off my tongue.

7. Being shortlisted to marry a complete stranger on radio.

6. Cody telling his teachers he has five dads!!! (he meant 5 uncles).

5. Joel telling his teacher that I was pregnant when I wasn't and then being congratulated in front of all the mums picking their kids up

4. Stephen telling EVERYONE that Joshua fell out!!

3. Cody saying at the top of his voice, 'mum you wear nappies don't you', when we went shopping and walking past the womens hygiene products.

2. kissing my darling boyfriend at 14 yrs old on a train in front of all our class while sharing chewing gum and lollies

1. My skirt blowing up to my neck last week out the front of a school and I wasn't wearing any underwear!!!!!

Got one more: I once got my head stuck in a certain friends sofa lounge and all I remember is not being able to get out and her whole family laughing at me whilst taking photos- Not mentioning anyone inparticular but the Berghofers might of had something to do with that.....

A new meaning to 'soggy sao'

My darling baby boy Joshua decided today he would run around nude after having a swim in the pool. Since it was a hot day, I happily let him run around and play a la natural.....He was eating some chips, kind of like sao's but smaller, he dropped some on the ground and then did a wee on them, before I could stop him he picked one up and ate the chip, wee and all.

Boys are sooooo dirty...... YUCK

The best website ever

This would have to be the best website ever. If you are completely unorganised like me then check it out. It will totally organise your life including telling you when to conduct random acts of kindness.

www.chorebuster.net

No child performer here

I love this photo of Joel. He seemed so impressed that he was sitting in the front row of a concert and had to perform, the video is even funnier!!!

Not your average mummy!!!

I had to share this story. Me being your average, normal mother (NOT!!), I went to pick my boys up from a school disco. I was thinknig back to when I was at school when I had a great idea. I'll dress up and go get them. So I put my best hot pink snake skin leather skirt on, with matching boa and tiara that flashed. I combined that with a hot pink boob tube top and a pretty jacket. The boys just laughed at me when I came to get them. (BTW I also made sure I had matching sparkly pink make up on). They know I'm not part of the tweed brigade (my reference to boring daggy mums). Nope I'm a hip happening mummy that still thinks she is 16 lol.....4eva!!!

Kids and pets don't mix!!!!

I've come to the conclusion that pets and children don't mix!! It all started when we got a new fish tank and put some lovely fishes in there for us all to enjoy- Mr 1 yr old decided that he would feed them and placed the whole tin of fish food in the fish tank along with a baby bottle and butter knife, dear big brother was supposed to be supervising while I was indisposed but thought what was on TV was far more interesting!!! We lost one fish due to over feeding, but I managed to save the remaining. It doesn't end there- Mr 1yr old decided that our two little mice would like a kiss and was going right up to the cage and putting his open mouth on it so the mice could stick their heads in and he could give them a kiss. The two mice and Mr 1yr old are becoming good friends- he feeds them his food and they share theirs with him!!! He did this while I was hanging clothes on the line. If it wasn't for him being incredibly cute, I'd be really angry at him!!!!

I took a photo of him after he had given the mice a kiss!!!

I had to share this with the world so we can watch the changing shape of Kylies Tattoo..... First photo is of her very flat stomach when she first found out she was expecting, the second was taken 2 days ago......Some women have all the luck- a tiny belly ball and thats it!!!!

School Photos

Like every parent, I love getting school photos and will pay a small fortune for the packs so I get a family pack and an individual pack per child. You generally pay up front and get them months later....mmmm.

This year, three days before the photos were to be done, my 10yr old darling son decided to go head first off his bike and take most of the skin off his nose and other parts of his face. It must of really hurt the poor fella, and now, thanks to the school photos, we will have a constant reminder of his bike accident.

Joshua with santa 2005

I love this time of year...... Santa comes to town soon....

It means Santa photos.

I love this one of Joshua taken last year

Mr Right

I didn't expect when I met Mr Right that his first name would be ALWAYS.......

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls". I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!"Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily.
Around 3a.m., a bit worse for wear, I headed for home. Just as I got inthe door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos =MIDNIGHT!) The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him"Midnight".He didn't seem concerned at all. Whew! Got away with that one!
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed 3 times, then said, "Ohsh*t.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 2 times, giggled, Cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.This is a joke that was sent to me....it wasn't me coming home!!!! Maybe it should be HAHAHA Cant remember the last time I staggered in at that time!!!

Steve Irwin- too funny

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pa_7P5AbUww

Check out this youtube video of Steve Irwin. It is funny and a nice way to remember the fun loving guy that he was.

CHECK OUT THIS ULTRASOUND

This is freaky- today, my friend Kylie had an ultrasound at 19 weeks, we did a 4D one and when we got home we had a look at the photos and found this one with what looks like a mans face in the right hand side of the picture resting on the spine. You can see the eyes, nose, mouth and chin, how freaky. It was great to see the bub moving around- and yes we found out what it was, a little girl, due 2/5/07. Do you think she is being looked after? Kylie has had 11 miscarriages in the last 16 years. This baby is a treasured gift that obviously has someone looking over it and protecting it.

My dad

This is the last photo of my dad. It was on Christmas Day 2005. It seems like only yesterday but still so long ago.

Not really normal

I hate to break it to all my avid fans out there, but I didn't come from a completely normal family. We did and still do the silliest things. We have a Karaoke Machine set up and at every opportunity we use it to entertain ourselves. I like these photos taken on NYE 2004. It reminds me of the days when sickness wasn't the head of our household and the man singing was. My Nephew looks so funny wondering what PA TEZZA (thats what he wanted to be called) was doing!!!!

Sex Discrimination based on pregnancy

On a serious note, reading the Sydney papers again today, I came across Tracey Spicers story. She has been axed as a TV news reporter by channel ten with the assumed reason being her carer responsibilities of that of a mother.

I too know this senario all too well. This time last year I was fired for HAVING a baby. My boss tried to substansiate his claim by listing performance issues such as 'poor karaoke singing', conducting fundraising for my workplace and not giving him the money to prop up the business account. It was also listed that I had a fetish with police (I do like men in uniform) as I called them to the workplace (see story below, EVERY emergency service was called), and the excuses go on and on. He even called the police on me...(now who has the fetish!!!) The bottom line is, I followed my complaint through and even if he paid me $1, I still would of felt vindicated.

I now can thank him as I got to spend the last month full time with my dad.

The only thing I wish for from my situation, is that one day, I will come face to face with him. Me as a nurse and him as my patient. Now thats Karma!!!!

23 days to Christmas

23 days to christmas and I'm counting.... I love Christmas- this year we are celebrating it at MY place so I get to play host, do the chrissy lights, wrap the presents and decorate the table. Since we don't have a fire place, we have a special key for santa to open the front door with and bring the presents in.... I love this time of year. Although its crappy without my dad, I have to continue on for my boys and show them a good time. My dad would of wanted that....

I've done all my Chrissy shopping too. My Chrisco hampers come on the 12th of December so all there is for me to do is wait...

I'm excited also because in just over 6 weeks time I'm going to be a Student Midwife. I can't wait. Although I have to travel 4 hrs to work and back again, (due to the nepotistic nature of a certain Area Health Service that will remain nameless)- Working in a bigger hospital will be better for me in the long run.

Also, Monday is the day Kylie finds out what she is having. She is now 19 weeks pregnant, so I'm excited. Its like I'm going through all the pregnancy with her just without the pain!!! Cool.

All in a Days work---- AGAIN

This is the day I almost watched my work place burn to the ground, tomorrow is the Anniversary and it still remains the most scarest of all days I have ever had. A retirement village on 16Ha almost burnt down and my job as village manager/ Administrator was to evacuate 186 residents- smelling fire and watching ELVIS the helicopter bomb the village with 10's of thousands of litres of water might give some people a small subtle hint that they should leave.... BUT NOOOOO, not my residents, seeing it was a hot day, 2 ladies, who will remain nameless, decided to go for a swim in the village pool. It wasn't until the police came and politely asked the refreshed residents to kindly get out before they became stew.....Another fond memory of that joyous workplace was hopping in the golf cart and with foot to the floor going straight over the larger than average gutters- like a scene out of a Jackass movie, my assistant and I flew through the air with exceptional speed, she still has never let me forget that.

Oh and my favourite of all was the resident that argued because he had fought in wars then he could fight the fire, with his hose pushing out little more pressure than what I can pee- he attempted to put out fires only stopping when some kind police man came and threathened to arrest him......Yep all in a days work alright!!!!

All in a dayzzzz work

How embarrasing!!! Why is it I get conned into going to work on Melbourne Cup Day looking like something out of Fountain Lakes.......

I seriously look like a deranged stalker in these photos.

And to think I was the boss and these two girls were my assistants!!!!!!!

My mate Christine

This is Christine before she became the next Australian Idol......

Meeting Terri Irwin

I had the pleasure of meeting Terri Irwin at Australia Zoo in 2004. She did the croc show while Steve was busy. I think she is an amazing, beautiful woman.

IMPORTANT NOTE TO SELF

Note to Self:

Never, Ever go out on a windy day in a skirt with no underwear!!!!

Here's some friggin happiness

I have taken a vow of poverty. If you really want to annoy me, give me money.

My own biggest loser comp

Ok so forget the idea of being a reality queen, now its my turn to do this weight loss, healthy eating idea myself. Without telling you all how much I actually weigh, I plan on showing this with photos etc. When I'm at a reasonable size I'll let you all know......It may surprise you.....

Want to join in and be a big loser together????? We could support each other via blogs and email......

The photo is of me this time last year. It was at the Ronald MacDonald Chrissy party for Joshua, will keep you posted with my progress.

Storm at Old Bar 1800hrs 28th November 2006

I took this photo of a storm cell from my lounge room window. It was coming straight for my house from the sea. Cool to watch and definately cooled things down after a hot day.

Thought of the day

Ever wondered why they use sterilized needles when someone is facing death by lethal injection??

What do people in China call their crockery if we call it China? Do they eat off Aussies and drink tea out of a kiwi cup?

How did they know what time to start time when it was first invented?

Oskar and Joshua, 2 little old men

Hold onto your good friends because they are few and far between.